12/31AM Wrong Side of the Bed (Luna/Usagi/Lucan)

[Luna]

Luna sighed and glanced skyward as if silently asking for patience to deal with the overly imaginative blonde before snapping, “Usagi be quiet, there isn’t any sense in wailing about such nonsense. Besides, you don’t want to be captured by that media crew wailing about sex and premonitions do you?”

She didn’t really think that the media was close enough to actually capture any of what Usagi was saying, but if it would calm the blonde down then she was willing to give them powers beyond what they could probably do. Luna glanced over at Lucan when he spoke up sharply and nodded in agreement. “Thank you Lucan ...” Turning back to Usagi, she added, “Usagi, you are simply over reacting. Now calm down a bit and listen to reason, please ...”

Luna glared at Usagi as the girl backed away, her ears once again pinned back in annoyance. She really needed to have a talk to Usagi about this new idea of hers, but where to begin? She had hoped that she would realize that it wasn’t a good idea and forget about it, but it did seem to be lingering longer then Luna would have liked. “Usagi, Lucan is right. You really should think about things before you entertain any ideas like this one. Please ...”

She gave Lucan a grateful glance when he mentioned cleaning up the rubbish and said, “If you can do that, it would be most appreciated Lucan. Also, you might want to do it before the senshi notice them, they might get the idea of cleaning up the trash on their own...”

[Neo Queen Serenity]

"They're not that close, Luna," Usagi snapped back in reply, far more sensible about distances than she was being about anything else. "There's no way they could get that close." She sniffed, folding her arms. "It was a premonition. I'm the Queen and I can have a premonition if I darn well want to! Royal privilege." However, both Luna's and Lucan's reactions managed to calm her down and force her to think through things logically. "I suppose you're right. But if you had a creepy premonition you'd think it was gonna happen, too!" Usagi insisted. She quieted down, reflecting on past dreams. "Since I've been Queen, I've had dreams about other stuff, too. Like a firing squad, things happening to me. You can't read about that kind of thing everyday without it getting to you... Lucan," Usagi asked suddenly. "What's it like to be shot?"

Usagi's eyes narrowed at Lucan and Luna. Though she wasn't even completely serious about the idea, she still believed she had a right to it, and wasn't that fond of being told what she could and could not do when it came to sexuality. "Experience, huh?" Back when she had been interviewing candidates for the head of security position, Usagi had called all of the references on the resumes. She had really hit it off with Lucan's personal reference, Mac. She ended up talking to him for four hours, and got all the dirt she ever wanted. It also was a major factor in convincing her to hire him. "You know, I think Mac told me some about this 'personal experience.' You can't mention it though and not follow through with an example! Why won't it make me feel better? I want to experience new things and I'm tired of feeling like I'm developmentally slow because I haven't 'done it' yet. And it's not like Luna has experience," Usagi said crossly, glaring at the cat. "She won't even admit that she's head over paws for Artemis."

Usagi waved her hand at Luna, not terribly concerned about the senshi at the moment. The suitors could wait. "I wanna hear this, Luna."

[Luna]

Luna ignored both Usagi and Lucan about the media getting close to them. She had known that, it was only her way of trying to get Usagi to calm down. The words had their desired effect, Usagi wasn’t wailing anymore and so she was satisfied. As for premonitions ... “Usagi, it wasn’t a premonition. You might be a queen, but you can’t change a stress dream into a premonition. That dream was only brought on by the fact that you believe Mamoru to be a stranger now, end of story.” Luna stared at Usagi in surprise when she asked what it felt like to be shot. What kind of question was that? She sighed softly, once again wishing that Usagi never had to feel the pressures that she was under constantly. What she wouldn’t give to be able to go back to the days when Usagi was just an innocent girl again ... at least some of the time, mostly she was just proud of the way Usagi had turned out.

Luna shook her head in irritation when Usagi asked Lucan to share his stories with her. Didn’t she know that some things deserved to be private? However, before she could say anything at all Usagi had brought up Artemis again. She stiffened and cried, “We aren’t speaking about me Usagi and I am not head over paws for anyone ... much less that furball that hasn’t even been around for a long time!”

She fell silent simply glaring at Usagi as Lucan shared his story. However, the moment he had finished and requested to be able to make his phone call again Luna spoke up. “Go on Lucan, make the phone call. Usagi has to get ready for the day, don’t you Usagi ... it's going to be a busy day after all.”

Luna continued to glare at the blonde, daring her to ask Lucan to stay longer. It was rather obvious that Lucan didn’t feel comfortable sharing his personal life, especially with both of them.

[Neo Queen Serenity]

"See," Usagi told Luna triumphantly as Lucan verified her suspicions. "The media can't touch us here." She still hadn't caught onto Luna's ploy to get her to calm down, which had worked spectacularly. Like Rei, Usagi couldn't pass up an opportunity to bicker about something with Luna, at least when she had an opportunity to be proven right. Being the ditz of the group, Usagi learned to savor those rare moments when she was proven correct over Luna or Rei.

Her expression softened at Lucan's answer to her question about getting shot. Lucan was not at all expressive, and it took her months to be able to read his subtle emotional cues. But it was obvious to just about anyone that the question had unsettled him. Usagi immediately felt guilty. Lucan was willing to defend her at any moment, and her question implied that someday he might fail. "I'm sorry," she said gently, reaching out to touch his sleeve. "It's not you, or security... It's just the nature of the job. You make me feel safer, not worse."

Her sensitivity, however, did not extend to Luna, who in Usagi's opinion had hid her feelings about Artemis for far too long. "'The feline doth protest too much,'" Usagi quoted, tweaking Queen Gertrude's line from Hamlet to fit Luna's predicament. "You are so head over paws for him, and the more miffed you get about it, the more you show it!" She grinned, not shy about explaining Luna's love life to Lucan. It wasn't like he wouldn't figure it out eventually. "If you didn't care about 'that furball' then you wouldn't get so upset by my connecting you with him."

Usagi just waved her hand at Luna once more. She was getting the sneaking suspicion that she was be 'handled' by Luna, and it was not a sensation that Usagi enjoyed, especially since becoming Queen. There were dozens of people wanting to 'handle' her, her press secretary and political advisors chief among them. "Actually I may need to be here for that phone call," she remarked, beginning to think like a queen. "There might be some legal ramifications. And, I need my morning brief," Usagi remarked. Besides, it was rude of Luna to just dismiss Lucan like that, or so she thought. Not that asking him about his sexual history was rude and too informal. There was no such thing as too informal for Usagi.

Usagi turned to stroll further into the large room, but stopped short at the sight of the doors, shattered and hanging sadly from their hinges, bits of them scattered about over the lovely marble floor. "You broke my doors!" Usagi said a little crossly. It had never quite occurred to her how Lucan had managed to get into the room. She had screamed, he was there, it was as simple as that. "I liked my doors. But... those doors are really heavy!" Though the veneer had mostly shattered or splintered off, the fiberglass core was still mostly intact. Usagi knelt, inspecting Lucan's shoes, impressed. "You didn't even get scuffed up!"

[Luna]

Luna glared at Usagi when she continued to bring up Artemis. Of course she cared about Artemis, he was her partner and her comrade. He had always been there when she most needed him, but Artemis knew that didn’t he? She knew that she didn’t exactly demonstrate her feelings to him all the time, but he knew ... he had to know. Frustrated with her own feelings and the fact that Usagi wouldn’t stop talking about it Luna snapped irritably, “I never said I didn’t care about him, but it .. It’s not like that!”

She raised her eyes skyward, seeking patience once more when Usagi requested Lucan to stay again. It was obvious to her that Lucan wanted to leave, but Usagi wasn’t noticing this. She would have spoken up on Lucan’s behalf once again, but she realized that Usagi was actually right about needing to have her morning brief and probably about needing to be there. Her disapproval turned once more toward pride as Usagi proved that she could be a responsible queen as well.

Luna shook her head in amusement when Usagi knelt down to inspect Lucan’s shoes. Apparently it never occurred to her that kneeling down inspecting someone’s shoes might not be the most dignified of things for a queen to do. Oh well, Usagi was never going to change and truthfully Luna didn’t want her too.

She watched Lucan disinterestedly on the phone talking with his people, fiddling with his tie and slapping it against his leg. That was when it hit her, Usagi was still prancing around in her nightgown with a man in the room. A filmy nightgown without even the benefit of a robe and she had just been having a conversation about sex with the man ...

Luna trusted Lucan ... she really did. After all the man was ready to lay down his life to make certain that Usagi was safe, but he was still a man, a man that didn’t even have the benefit of being her fiancé.

She whirled to face Usagi once again, the fur along her back bristling in alarm as she hissed, “Usagi put down that folder this instant and get dressed! It is hardly proper to be wandering around in your nightgown!”

[Neo Queen Serenity]

"Sure it's not like that," Usagi remarked, determined to have the last word. At least she got Luna to admit out loud that she cared about Artemis at all. "You certainly spend a lot of time denying you have any feelings for him. It's lucky you have me around to translate for you, otherwise people might get the wrong idea."

Usagi giggled a bit at Lucan's teasing, standing back up again. "I always figured you for the stealthy type," she winked, and then blanched at his mention of an error on the card reader, gently toeing the ground and feeling stupid. "Uh, well... I sort of... played with it a few months back. There were so many buttons, and I was curious, and... Well, I guess I pressed the wrong combination because it said 'reset...' And I forgot to mention it," she remarked, following Lucan to the doors and taking the brief from him. "Don't hate me! It was an accident. And it doesn't matter, anyway," she said, glancing at the shattered doors again as he went back into the room to make his call.

Giggling again, Usagi went to the small writing desk in the corner and fished out a Sharpie, carefully stepping over the splinters to write 'Lucan was here' in English on the fiberglass core that was left. She scribbled the date and time for posterity, and drew a few hearts. Had to make it look pretty!

Capping the pen, Usagi came back in, opening her briefing book, but it was kind of funny to watch Luna watch Lucan with his tie. "Geez, that's making me nervous!" she remarked, standing up and walking over, taking it from his grasp and toss it around his neck again, quickly tying a half-Windsor knot. She had to stand on her tip-toes to do it, but at least there wouldn't be a tie-whip being smacked around the room anymore.

Once again, she picked up the briefing folder, only to nearly drop it again in surprise as Luna turned on her and hissed at her to get dressed. Swallowing, she glanced down at her attire, a sinking feeling in her stomach she she remembered that she was clad only in her diaphanous nightgown. Usagi felt a rush of blood to her face, turning her chest, arms and ears a bright red as well. She was flushing so hard that she could feel her own pulse in her face. Dropping the folder, she crossed her arms in front of her chest, trying to hide that part of the anatomy. "Well, there wouldn't be much use in that, I've already been doing this for awhile..." she remarked. It wasn't like she could take back the fact that Lucan had seen her like this! Still, she now felt extremely uncomfortable and realized that she could hardly expect to turn pages with her arms crossed over her breasts.

"Cover for me," she whispered to Luna, darting off through the door that linked to the large bathroom, closets and dressing room. She had to get dressed as quickly as possible before she might be needed on the phone. It sounded as if Lucan was going to be talking to the Minister of Justice, and what would she say if she was late getting on the phone when she needed to be? 'I'm sorry Minister, I just realized I was standing around in my nightgown while my Head of Security is calling you and I had to get changed before either of us realized just how undressed I really was...' That would go over well! It didn't even occur to her that she could lie about the matter should she be delayed coming back.

When she stumbled into the dressing room, a maid was there, carefully laying out clothes and jewelry she would be wearing during the short 'work-day.' "Help me," Usagi gasped, fiddling with the gown, still quite flustered from Luna's realization. "I need to get changed fast; Lucan is talking to the Minister of Justice and I might be needed at any moment."

"Right away, Your Majesty," the maid replied promptly, helping lift the gown over Usagi's head and making sure that her long hair didn't tangle while she did so. The girl seemed to hesitate before asking, "the head of the Secret Service was in your chambers?"

"Well, yes," Usagi replied, thinking that an odd question. She hooked the snaps on her bra and reached for the blouse. "He was on the night-shift last night." Technically, the detail were in the antechambers attached to her bedroom. The maid's eyes grew wide, and Usagi heard stifled gasps coming from behind one of the doors leading out to a corridor that the servant's used. She narrowed her eyes, suddenly realizing what she had just said, and how it was going to be received.

"Get out, and take your gossiping friends with you," she commanded coldly. "I don't want to see you in my sight again." She had a good idea who had been leaking some of the rumors, and found herself shaking with mortification and anger. Startled, the maid dropped the rest of her clothes and darted out, closing the door behind her. Usagi picked up one of the pumps left out and chucked it after her, taking satisfaction from the thump that the shoe made when it made contact with the wall.

"Oh, God..." she muttered, sinking down to the floor and putting her head in her hands. Unbidden, tears sprung to her eyes. There would be enough gossip about everyone with the suitors coming in, and she had just poured fuel onto the fire with her stupid, if innocent, admission. Those inconsiderate little fiends! Don't they have any shame, snooping around and telling everyone they meet about the private business of others?! She sniffled, wiping at her eyes. This was not the time to be crying, but she simply couldn't hold the tears in.

Because you're so much better, Usagi, another voice in her head spoke up. You shamelessly talked about Luna's private feelings in front of someone else, without any regard to how she felt about it... And you asked Lucan about his private life, thinking you had a right to know... You're as bad as the servants are!

Usagi gasped aloud in embarrassment, feeling like she just wanted to sink into the floor and die. What a spectacle she had made of herself this morning! She had been so selfish and immature; she didn't think she could go out and face them both again, no matter who was waiting for her on the phone. She would die if she had to look either of them in the eyes again. She could just stay here, in the room... Anything but go out again! What she said to the maids would probably be known by the whole palace before noon!

[Luna]

Luna shook her head in annoyance as Usagi continued to tease her about Artemis, deciding not to say another word. If she continued to deny what Usagi was saying, the teasing would only get worse. Besides, she wasn’t truly that irritated over it. It would keep Usagi’s mind off her other troubles and anyway, Luna knew perfectly well that if she was really upset over the teasing Usagi would stop. That was just the kind of person that Usagi was, besides it only meant that Usagi viewed her as a friend ... friends teased one another.

“Usagi ...” She groaned softly when she heard Usagi say that she had played with the card reader. When would Usagi grow up? There were times when Luna thought she had matured quite a bit and then there were times like this. For what felt like the hundredth time that morning, Luna raised her eyes skyward silently asking for patience when she saw Usagi scribble Lucan’s name, date, time, and a few hearts on the fiberglass core. Perhaps she had stepped into a time warp somehow and she really was sitting here with a teenaged Usagi instead of the woman who was suppose to be queen of the world. Oh well, at least she should be glad that Usagi could write in English these days.

Luna started to growl when Usagi seemed to be about to say that since the damage was already done she might as well continue standing around in her nightgown. However, she relaxed when moments later she darted off to get dressed. What was she going to do with that girl? She really had to consider everything she did, but then it hadn’t really been her fault that Lucan had come busting through the door. Luna was simply glad that it was Lucan and not some other person. Lucan she could trust, he probably hadn’t even really noticed the queen’s inappropriate attire and if he had he would keep his mouth shut.

She went back to watching Lucan as she waited for Usagi to return, wondering how long it would take for the Minister of Justice to come to the phone. Hopefully Usagi would be back before she was needed on the phone. The maid should be in there so hopefully she would be able to help Usagi get presentable enough to return quick enough.

After waiting for a few minutes, Luna glanced irritably toward the door. It certainly was taking longer for Usagi to return then she had thought it would. Surely they weren’t in there chattering about nonsense things, though in the mood Usagi had been in this morning she wouldn’t have put it past her. Perhaps she should go check on Usagi, hurry her up a bit ... after all the Minister of Justice would probably be on the phone before long.

Luna rose to her feet and wandered into the dressing room, intent upon scolding both Usagi and the maid for taking so long. She froze, startled, to see Usagi on the floor half dressed and started to say, “Usagi, what on earth are you ...”

That was when she saw the tears and quickly darted over to Usagi, fearful that she had been hurt or maybe even that the events of recent days had finally caused her to breakdown or something. She nudged Usagi gently and murmured, “Usagi-chan ... what happened? Are you alright? Did something happen? Are you hurt? Where is the girl that’s suppose to be helping you?”

[Neo Queen Serenity]

Usagi glanced up with a gasp as Luna came in, and then quickly burrowed her face in her hands, turning towards the wall. She felt the hot tears continuing to leak out, and Luna's presence only made her feel even more puerile than before. "Don't look at me, Luna!" she sobbed. The entire morning was like a riding a ship during the storm; one moment there was calm seas, and the next, the deck was pitching with the waves. She had been confused, shocked, amused, playful, teasing, and mortified, all within her first hour of consciousness. If the rest of day was going to be as dramatic as her morning was turning out to be, she was ready to go back to bed and start all over again!

However, Usagi couldn't just ignore Luna's pleas for answers. Luna's sweetness and concern made her own behavior seem that much uglier and infantile in comparison. "I've been such a... bitch this morning!! I've been so wrapped up in my own concerns that I didn't think about how you might feel about me teasing you over Artemis in front of Lucan, and I certainly wasn't very considerate of him. And I've been dressed like a hoochie and acting like one too!"

At Luna's mention of the maid, Usagi moaned and began to lightly pound her forehead against the wall. "I dismissed her. Dismissed as in fired... Some of her friends were spying on me, and I told her... She asked me a question, and I gave an honest answer but I already know what she took it to mean, and... Oh, God, the rumor will be all over the Palace!"

She rubbed at her eyes, curling into an even tighter ball. "I can't go out there, Luna! I can't face you, I can't face Lucan, and I definitely can't face the rest of the world! I'll stay in here today. We'll tell everyone I've got the flu and we'll make my apologies... but I'm not leaving!"

[Luna]

Luna blinked in surprise when Usagi told her not to look at her. She knew that Usagi had been upset after she had woken up from that dream, but it was starting to get a little ridiculous. Usagi was going through one emotional extreme to the next, like an emotional roller coaster.

She sighed in regret the moment she heard Usagi’s answers. She hadn’t meant to make Usagi feel badly. “Usagi, please don’t say such things. It isn’t true. You are the farthest thing from a ... a bitch that there can be. You have just been upset, that’s all. Lucan and I certainly don’t think anything of the way you’ve been acting.” Usagi’s teasing had been annoying, but other then that she hadn’t really cared that much. Lucan, well it had been a little inconsiderate to ask after his experiences but if he hadn’t wanted to answer then he wouldn’t have. As for dressing and acting like a hoochie, that was certainly not true in the slightest. The nightgown had been an accident, nobody was at fault.

At first Luna was confused when Usagi had said she had dismissed the maid. As far as Luna had been concerned she had been a fairly competent girl and so she couldn’t understand why Usagi would have wanted to fire her. However, as she continued to listen to what Usagi was actually saying she grasped the situation quickly enough. It was the very thing she had been worried about had it been anyone other then Lucan in the room earlier. It simply hadn’t occurred to her to warn Usagi not to mention the ordeal to the maid. She sighed sadly and gently said, “I’m sorry Usagi ... there are people out there that are going to want to hurt you. The same people that have been spreading nasty rumors about Ami and Rei ... well talk to them, they will understand.”

Regrettably Luna could not allow Usagi to stay in this room. As a queen she had responsibilities and even if she was embarrassed and horrified the world wouldn’t accept the fact that she wasn’t out there celebrating with them. Trying to be as understanding but firm as possible, Luna shook her head and said, “I’m sorry Usagi. You know as well as I do that you have to be there at that ball tonight. I would love to give you the opportunity to hide in your rooms all night long, but as the queen you will be expected to attend. At any rate, hiding in your rooms will only make things worse. People will believe that you are hiding because it is true ... now come on be the brave queen I know you are and finish getting dressed so that you can go out there and speak to the Minister of Justice. I’ll be right there beside you the whole time.”

[Neo Queen Serenity]

At Luna's reassurances, Usagi pulled away from the wall a little, spreading her fingers so she could peek out at Luna through them. Her words were a bit muffled from her hands being over her face, but still audible. "Are you sure?" Usagi asked in a shaking, tiny voice. "I am upset, but that's no excuse to be so childish and inconsiderate of people. I'm sorry I pushed you so hard, Luna. I just wasn't thinking..."

She shook her head. "I know there are going to be people out to hurt me. Believe me, I know. I read about it in every morning brief; I read it in editorials, see it on the news, in the tabloids, about my friends and my family, receive mail on it, emails, phone calls that are recorded. That girl isn't the first. There was my former roommate, some of my classmates, a former coworker, that other intern I worked with-- I thought these people were my friends Luna. I was nice to that maid, I thought if I was the 'cool' Queen that she'd return the favor. I know people have their own agendas but I can't walk around suspecting everyone I meet of having ulterior motives. But then again, I am and will continue to keep getting burned, and it hurts.... because... There's enough knives in my back just because I'm Queen, I never thought that-- that my Mamo-chan would be one of them."

Usagi didn't even realize she was still upset about Mamoru until the topic once again overwhelmed her. "And how can I realize a rumor like this is going around and not think of him? How is he going to react to the news, to people writing about him? How is he going to feel, seeing all of these men come after me? And why do I even care how he feels when he did this to me!" she burst out, her voice rising. "Why? Why?! I want to know why he did this to me, to us-- and the only stupid reason he could give me was that it was too inconvenient, that we wouldn't have understood. Did he care so little about the truth, about me-- that that was an acceptable excuse for him? I wasted ten years of my life on him-- I've cried for him so many times; I've bled for him! And this is what our relationship really is-- the pull of destiny, duplicity, and multiple identities! Was everything just a waste? And I'm so angry at myself-- for not seeing this, for not addressing the issue earlier, for not communicating my expectations better, for allowing him to hurt my friends! I'm angry at myself for not knowing about the maid, for trusting people so much, for not being able to stop talking about Chiba Mamoru! He told me he loved me, that he'd protect me-- and I," she said with venom, a look of self-loathing washing over her face. "I believed him."

Tears running down her face, Usagi just shook her head, feeling like she had finally hit the wall. "People are going to think bad things regardless of what I do. I know what they expect, but we'll just say I'm sick," she insisted stubbornly. "I'm taking a mental health day, Luna. I can't-- I just can't."

[Luna]

Luna smiled and reassured, “Usagi, if I had really been upset I would have left. There is a difference between hurtful teasing and lighted hearted teasing between friends, you and I are friends are we not? Please, don’t worry about it ... I don’t mind if you tease me. I might get annoyed at times, but I know that you would stop if I was ever really upset.”

She sighed sadly before saying, “There really isn’t anything that I can say that will make any of that any better. There are people that just like to do things like that for whatever reason, but Usagi not everyone is like that. You are the one that I admire Usagi, despite everything you still do trust people. I don’t want you to change.” She smiled teasingly before adding, “The rest of us can be the ones that are suspicious, you just keep doing what you are best at doing ... trusting people. Eventually you will win the people’s hearts and trust, much of the world already believes in you and every little thing that you do to make their lives better.” She hesitated slightly before continuing, “Just always keep in mind that there are the few people who will fall below your expectations, as for Mamoru ...”

Luna shrugged uneasily about the rumor and murmured, “He should be smart enough to know that rumors aren’t always the truth, especially since it happened to both him and Ami earlier. I don’t have any idea how he would react to the news writing about him, I assume he would expect it really he’s always been a smart man. As for how he would react to your new suitors ... well depends on how he really feels I guess. Mamoru is generally a very closed off person so it’s hard to say how he would react to anything.”

She fell silent as Usagi continued speaking about Mamoru, obviously more upset then she had earlier let on if the rise in her voice and the barrage of questions were any indication. Luna didn’t have a clue as to why he had done anything. She really hadn’t even seen him since the truth had been revealed. She really had no clue as to how to respond, but then she remembered that Lucan had said that perhaps Mamoru had been just as confused and hurt by Usagi’s behavior as she had been by his.

“Usagi, remember what Lucan said last night, that we should look at things from Mamoru’s perspective? Now I’m not saying that what Mamoru did was good, in fact I agree that he should have told us or at least you about the Shitennou. However, there is a chance that he really felt that what he was doing was the right thing to do. He might have lashed out at you that night because he felt he was being attacked, sometimes people react badly to being confronted especially if they feel they haven’t done anything wrong.”

She paused momentarily, trying to gather her thoughts on the subject before continuing with what she had been saying.

“Mamoru said that he had the Shitennou ever since the Dark Kingdom didn’t he? I don’t know how any of us would have reacted to the news back then, perhaps we really wouldn’t have understood. We had just finished fighting them and we had precious few memories at the time. It is entirely possible that we would have reacted in just the way Mamoru thought we would. He might should have trusted us better, but Mamoru has never been big on trust and perhaps he felt it was his duty as their prince to protect them at the time. Once a secret has been successfully kept, the longer it goes on without being revealed the harder it is to bring up the truth. It isn’t a good excuse, but it does happen.”

She hesitated once again before slowly saying, “If the situations were reversed Usagi and it was the senshi that had been within the Dark Kingdom and if you had a hard time trusting others. If Mamoru had only seen them being the enemy and then you got them back again, their souls safely housed within stones ... would you have trusted him to not want to attack, to believe they weren’t the enemies he was use to fighting?”

Luna shifted uncomfortably before continuing on, “Usagi, Mamoru is really the only one that can answer any of these questions. I can only try to come up with answers and they might or might not be the right ones. From what I’ve seen I’ve always thought he loved you. He’s done his best to always protect you even at the cost of his well being. It’s always been my opinion that it was Usagi that he loved and not just for the fact that you were Serenity or Sailor Moon. Perhaps you should try to talk to him again, unless of course you don’t love him anymore ...”

This had gone on long enough, there simply wasn’t any way that Luna could allow Usagi to take a mental health day. Even if she was upset, Usagi couldn’t just take a day off from being the queen. She had responsibilities and it was high time she remembered them. “Usagi,” Luna snapped a trace of anger in her tone this time, “You are the queen and you will get dressed and get out there to do what you are suppose to be doing. I’m sorry, but there are things that a queen can and can’t do ... taking a mental health day is one of them. You don’t get a break, you don’t get a chance to hide away from the world and your responsibilities.” She paused a moment before adding in a more gentle tone, “Besides, the senshi will be at that ball tonight ... do you really think it’s fair to make them face the world when you want to hide away in here like a frightened child?”

[Neo Queen Serenity]

Usagi let out a small sigh of relief, mollified enough to drop her hands completely and return Luna's gaze. "We are friends," she agreed. "And I would never purposefully try to hurt you, but I know I can be insensitive sometimes. Promise you'll let me know if I take it too far... That way I'll at least have an opportunity to properly apologize and make it up to you," she offered. Usagi had a fear that people would stop speaking up when she trespassed an unseen boundary. She never wanted to have to wonder if people were angry at her. It was so much healthier to be honest.

She listened patiently to Luna's remarks about Mamoru, appreciating the second opinion even if it made her uncomfortable at times. Usagi felt sure she wasn't handling this right; one moment she was fine, and the next she was a total mess without him. There seemed to be no rhyme or reason to it-- she was grieving the loss. Ten years was a long time. It felt like someone had died, and perhaps, someone had-- the someone they were together, the couple, was forever gone... Just thinking like that made her feel cold.

"I did my best to give him a chance to explain. I never yelled at him or insulted him... I listened to what he said. I don't know how he could feel attacked, but you may be right... But-- just like it's not okay for me to be inconsiderate of others because I'm feeling upset, the same goes for him and anyone else! We need to be able to control ourselves, especially when we're angry-- and he was-- well, like I said, it scared me. I don't love him, because I don't know him. But I will probably have to talk to him," she grumbled, remembering the conversation last night very clearly herself.

"If the situation had been reversed, Luna," Usagi continued on firmly, "I would have told him. It would have been quite difficult, he might not have understood and might have reacted poorly, and I would have been extremely scared about it. And it would have been hard to work past not being able to trust other people. It certainly would not have been a cake walk, but I would have done it. I would have done it because no matter how difficult it was for me, it was not about me. Because no matter how hard it was, it also affected the lives of other people, and no amount of personal feelings is an excuse to make their decisions for them, to keep secrets from the people I love! I would have told him no matter what, because it was the right thing to do. It was the right thing to do. The. Right. Thing. To. Do."

Taking a breath, Usagi continued. "I can have empathy for all of that, I can understand and forgive it-- but those factors are possible explanations of his behavior-- but they're not excuses. 'Just because I felt like it' is not going to absolve anyone of wrongdoing! And that's what Mamoru couldn't reconcile himself with, and why I can't be with him. There are no excuses for what he did. If he would've just accepted responsibility-- we might not be where we are right now. He needs to understand, as a future husband and a future King, that he doesn't get to do whatever he wants to, just because he feels strongly about it!"

Of course, it hit her then. She was doing the exact same thing, hiding out just because she felt extremely embarrassed and emotionally spent. Luna said as much, but her anger shocked Usagi. Emotion drained from her face, leaving her cold and regal. Even though mentally she agreed with Luna, the tone left much to be desired. She could accept Luna's strongly worded advice, but Usagi was now full-grown. She wouldn't be ordered to do anything, and that included getting dressed, as if she was five years old instead of twenty-four.

Numbly, she got to her feet and walked to the door, opening it a crack for Luna. "I would like to be left alone, now," Usagi said simply, her expression carefully composed, even though her eyes still glittered with unshed tears.

[Luna]

Luna smiled and said, “You aren’t insensitive Usagi, sometimes you get carried away but I’m sure that everyone does that. As for promising to let you know if you go too far, when have I ever not told you when I was upset at something. It doesn’t matter if you are the queen of the whole world, you aren’t ever going to be anything other then my friend, Usagi to me.”

She was glad that Usagi listened to everything she had said about Mamoru. As an advisor she did want to do her best to give Usagi as many things to think through to help her make her decisions, even when she actually agreed with the way Usagi was already feeling. “I know you did Usagi, I never doubted it ... I was just trying to say that was how he might have felt. I agree with you that he was being inconsiderate, especially if he scared you. I don’t like that at all, but ...” Luna fell silent when Usagi said that she didn’t love Mamoru anymore because he was a stranger to her. Regardless of how angry she was with Mamoru at the moment, Luna was actually sorry that things had turned out this way. She knew that Usagi had been happy before and to think that everything she had felt died, simply made Luna sad. It would get better in time, at least she hoped it would. She shifted slightly when Usagi mentioned having to talk to him and muttered, “I’m still not happy with that thought, but I guess you have no choice.”

Luna nodded in agreement with Usagi’s decision that she would have told Mamoru about the senshi if the situation had been reversed. She agreed with her and said as much. “It would have been the right thing to do Usagi, I was only trying to say how he might have viewed things. I also agree that as a future husband and king he needed to understand that he doesn’t get to do things the way he wanted to. However, do keep in mind that he wasn’t always going to be the future king ... though that also doesn’t take away the fact that he should have told you.”


She silently cursed herself, realizing that once again she had upset Usagi. That hadn’t been her intention, she had simply been getting impatient. She shouldn’t have snapped at Usagi like she had, but there wasn’t anything she could do about that. Luna sighed softly and murmured, “Usagi, I ...”

However she stopped talking and simply nodded when Usagi asked to be left alone. She stood and walked over to the door, hating to leave on such a sour note but what could she say?

I’m sorry that I got mad ...

That wouldn’t really help anything and it would only serve to take up more time. Lucan might have already reached the Minister of Justice by now and Usagi really did need to get out to the phone. She would make it up to her later. Glancing back up at Usagi, Luna said, “I’ll be right outside if you need anything ...” before continuing out the door to see what Lucan was up to, tail and ears drooping miserably once again. She really did hate when Usagi was upset with her.

[Luna]

Luna sighed sadly as she wandered into the room. She needed to think of a way to make it all up to Usagi and to make her feel better at the same time. Perhaps she could go talk Makoto into making Usagi all that chocolate she spoke of the night before, that always served to make her feel a little better. She looked up at Lucan when he spoke to her before looking back down to the floor and saying, “Not really, there was an incident ...”

Luna turned her gaze back up to Lucan and said, “She had to fire her maid just a moment ago because apparently the maid had some of her friends there spying on Usagi. She said that the maid had asked her a question and that she gave an honest answer but that she already knew how the maid had taken it to mean. Considering the fact that Usagi was just in here with you barely dressed, well I can see where that would go as well. Usagi is upset because she knows the rumors will be all over the Palace.”

Although she had been counting on Lucan not even realizing that Usagi had been prancing about in front of him in only her nightgown, Luna knew that he would eventually hear the rumors. Since Lucan was going to be a part of those rumors he might as well be aware of how they had come about and anyway he needed to make certain that maid left the palace for good.

Luna gazed at the television when Lucan gestured to it. She frowned as she watched just a little over the interviews before turning back to Lucan questioningly. “Isn’t it bad enough that they are here harassing Usagi, do they really have to bother the others as well? Why on earth do they think the senshi even want to be courted?”

[Luna]

Luna’s mood lightened considerably when she realized that Lucan wasn’t the least bit worried about things. He was definitely a professional when it came to this stuff, much more experienced then any of them. If he wasn’t concerned then she wouldn’t be either, except of course for Usagi’s feelings.

She nodded in agreement when he began talking about confidentiality agreements and murmured, “That sounds like a good idea, but would it help with everyone that has already been hired? We have a lot of staff around here ...”

Luna snickered when Lucan pointed out the door as well as the scribbles that Usagi had given it as decoration, perhaps there was a benefit to being silly at times. It would be interesting to see how the staff explained that away, after all it would be seen especially by the people fixing the door.

She sighed and shook her head in irritation at the entire situation. Luna wouldn’t ever understand the paparazzi, or even the kinds of people that could ruin another person’s life just to get something for themselves. She couldn’t remember the time on the moon being this hard to deal with, but then perhaps she just couldn’t remember it very well. She might just not remember having to deal with the media back then, or maybe things had just been easier because they had grown up with it all instead of being thrust into it all of a sudden. Perhaps it was both, she figured she’d probably never really know and it didn’t really matter that much.

“Minako should at least be use to the paparazzi and I guess the others haven’t been bothered much yet because it was much more interesting to bother the new queen. They’ll get use to it, if Usagi and Minako can then the rest of them can as well.”

Luna paused before grinning and saying, "Unless of course they destroy them first ..." She obviously didn't mean it, but it was rather pleasing to imagine the paparazzi and the unpleasant crowd outside running from the senshi.

Luna nodded wearily when Lucan said to be prepared for the political pricks who would want to take advantage of the situation. She had already figured that much out. She huffed in irritation at the idea that Usagi should directly address the public, imagining all the difficult and painful questions they would want to throw at her. However, there really wasn’t any choice. Usagi was the queen therefore she was going to have to be in the public eye, but that didn’t mean Luna had to like it.