Revelations 12/28 AM, inner senshi, Luna

[Mizuno Ami]

Ami did not shine a bit of light into Makoto's eyes to check dilation, but rather kept an eye on her as she came to, watching for any indications that the fainting had been anything other than what Ami had said. However, Makoto's own words tended to confirm the diagnosis.

"Just one." She looked to Usagi, "You'd suggested we eat and it seems like we're going to be here for a while. Could we have some real food brought in? Mako-chan needs to take that with food anyway, and since it seems like we've all decided to help with Nairoibi once we ... deal with this."

It was very rare for Ami to take charge outside of a medical setting, but there was a medical situation governing her reactions and decisions, and the last thing that Makoto needed on top of a fainting spell and a horrible headache was nausea from the medication. She also figured that Usagi probably needed something more than repeated cups of espresso.

[Kino Makoto]

Makoto managed to smile at Usagi as she accepted the offered glass of water. She took a small sip before setting the glass beside her. “Please don’t fuss over me too much, you guys. I’ll be fine, really. I just need to get rid of this headache, that’s all.” Taking Rei’s hand, she rose from the floor and back to her seat that she’d fallen from. She offered a quick “Thanks” to Rei as she took the small bottle from her hand and opened it. She shook one of the small pills into her hand before reaching for the water again.

“I’m not sure I could eat very much right now, Ami. But I’ll have a few bites of the croissant I have here to at least go with the medication for now.” She reached for the plate, removing the pastry and taking a bite as promised. She offered a smile as she chewed.

Meanwhile her mind continued to race. They were expecting an explanation of what had just happened. She supposed she’d best get on with it and get it out of the way. The sooner she shared, the sooner she could retreat to figure out the rest for herself. She set the plate back down to the table and took another sip of water. Her head still pounded, but she hoped that Ami’s prescription would not take too long to kick in.

She closed her eyes and took a breath. “I think I remembered something…well, someone actually… from the Silver Millennium. It’s all so confusing really. I can’t even say what exactly I remember about him. I just remember that he was in my life.” She looked to each of her friends before continuing. “It’s Nephrite.”

[Neo Queen Serenity]

Usagi nodded to Ami. "You can have whatever you'd like, of course." She swiveled her chair around, glancing at the plasma screen. "There's two ways to order. If it's just me I usually ask the server personally because that's more-- well, personal. If it's more than just me, it's easier to do it by computer. Daichi," she said, addressing her computer by the nickname she had given it, to which it would respond. The name meant 'great knowledge,' which she figured suited a computer. The screen came to life. "Alright, just say what you want... There's voice recognition software, so it should know. Anything you want. Oh, and while I'm thinking of it--" she turned back. "Daichi, add new task, title: file incident report." She had to write up any falls or medical incidents, and that would include Makoto. The computer confirmed task #6724, making Usagi grimace at the thought of all that needed to be done. "Deadline: 48 hours, priority 2, delegate to Medic Team Alpha-- confirm and send." Now that that was out of the way, hopefully the others would order their food and get on with it. Usagi, for once in her life, was not remotely hungry. The pressure of everything was deflating her appetite.

Listening attentively, Usagi found herself nodding slowly again in response to Makoto's explanation. "I'm certain that we knew the Shitennou in the Silver Millennium-- though I can't say in what capacity." Mamoru had all but confirmed that the night before, and Usagi had had an inkling about a connection to their past lives with Khalid, anyway. "Khalid ibn Maleec-- the VP of an energy company that I'm fairly sure is Kunzite-- set off a much less potent but similar reaction. I felt as if he was connected to the Silver Millennium. While I'm talking about that, I should mention that I ran into him by chance the other day in the Palace. His company was one of several competing for a major energy contract. After speaking with him, I awarded UAE Oil with said contract. The company itself is up for the task, but it serves a dual purpose of keeping a very close eye on this man." Usagi decided to just get that bit of information out to clear up any confusion, since Rei had already mentioned that she thought she had found Kunzite. She wanted Makoto to continue on if the senshi had more to say about her ordeal, but if all Usagi did was sit there and nod attentively, they would never get through this meetings.

[Hino Rei]

Rei settled back into her chair as Makoto did hers, now that the woman seemed as if she'd be okay. The Priestess's thoughts tumbled about in her head, surrounding what she'd seen. Shaking her head, Rei reached again for her water glass and when it was drained poured herself some orange juice. Food was still out of the question. "So what you're saying, Makoto, is that you might be able to collaborate Mamoru's story."

With another shake of her head, Rei gave a faint sigh and lifted one hand to rub her left temple. "Though I really don't think that's the question right now. Regardless of whether or not they were with us in the past, that doesn't absolve any of them from their crimes with Beryl and Metallica. Regardless of whatever we remember or feel about them."

[Luna]

Luna again declined on anything to eat, she simply wasn’t hungry at the moment. Besides, she was far too interested in the current discussion to bother with something like that. She listened carefully as Makoto began speaking.

She thoughtfully stared at her paws, remaining quiet as she listened to Usagi as well. The idea that the Shitennou were a part of the senshi’s life in the past felt right, though she couldn’t seem to remember details very much. The most she could remember about them was that they had become the enemy, both in the past and in the current life. There was so much that she could remember, but this one little detail seemed to evade her.

Luna glanced up as Rei spoke once more, nodding in agreement with the priestess. “I agree Rei. Regardless of who or what they might have been, the fact remains they were our enemies. We need to be careful around them.”

She glanced over at Usagi warily for a moment, uncertain how she would react in regards to Mamoru. She didn’t want to believe that Usagi’s future husband was collaborating with former enemies, but the fact remained that he had apparently admitted it to Rei. She knew that Rei had said that he had no remorse about it, but perhaps he had explained better to Usagi. Although she didn’t particularly want to upset Usagi, she finally asked, “Usagi, have you had a chance to talk with Mamoru about this?”

[Mizuno Ami]

Ami frowned as she retook her own seat, she knew no one was hungry, but she worried about the side affect from Makoto's medicine as well as Usagi's consumption of so many espressos. "Fruit, Cheese, and Bread. I know no one's hungry, but you can nibble, and I want to make sure everyone's all right."

She took a deep breath as she turned her attention back to the topic. She frowned deeply at Rei and Luna's comments and bit her lip for a moment, trying to gather her own thoughts and put them into words. She did not realize that she had reverted to her old habit, her hands no longer clenched in her lap, but held together in front of her mouth.

"Lovers... " She swallowed, "They were our lovers." She blushed as she spoke, but knew it was no time to keep her memories - as painful as they were to herself. "That's what made it the worst. They weren't our enemies. I trusted him, loved him... when he..." She shook her head, not wanting to finish that thought.

She could not look at the others as she spoke, blushing deep as she ever did. "But we know what Chaos can do... isn't there some chance... that... that the Ginzuishou healed them... that they aren't our enemies now?"

[Kino Makoto]

Makoto looked to Usagi as she spoke about Kunzite…well, Khalid in this life. She was going to be working with him in the future, and would therefore be keeping an eye on him. If this was what they were going to be doing…scrutinizing these men, watching them to make sure they weren’t evil…she wondered if she should tell them that she was supposed to be going to dinner with Nathaniel tonight.

Rei only made her decision harder. She had a point. Regardless of their past lives, they were last known to be pawns of Beryl and Metallia and could still be the enemy. That was even more worrisome. If the Dark Kingdom Generals were to re-awaken…would that mean they may be facing Beryl and Metallia once again? Makoto was only more confused as a battle raged within her mind as to what to say next.

Luna saved her. “Luna’s right. What does Mamoru have to say about all this?”

And then Ami dropped another bomb; one that only confirmed the small memory that had returned. She made up her mind. If Ami could speak up about it then she could too. She nodded in agreement with Ami. “I think that’s what I remembered. At least, that’s what I gather…” Mako sighed and closed her eyes. “The other night, when I was running late for the meeting and I said that I’d bumped into Nathaniel… I neglected to mention that we kissed.” She looked at Rei, knowing there would be some sort of glare in her direction.

She lowered her head and looked down at her hands, which were lightly shaking as she recalled that night. “The thing about the kiss though… It was so familiar. So…right.” A slight flush tinted her cheeks, but she continued. “But out of nowhere, for a reason I didn’t know until now, I called him ‘Nephy’ and pushed him away.” Her blush deepened at what she knew must have been a private pet name, but it was integral to her story so she had no choice but to share it. “But if what Rei says is right. If Nathaniel is Nephrite…that would explain why I remembered that name.”

[Neo Queen Serenity]

Usagi felt as if she was sitting in a tunnel, and the senshi and Luna were on the other side of it. All of their words and actions seemed to take a long time to travel to her and sink in. There was so much going on, on wave of shock after another, that she simply felt numb, and too fatigued to even express much surprise. She just sat there nodding dumbly.

She felt her chest constrict as they asked about Mamoru, unsure if she could unseal her lips to even answer, it felt so painful. As Ami talked about the Shitennou being the senshi's lovers, and as Makoto spilled about her rendezvous with Nathaniel, bits and pieces of the argument she had with Mamoru came back to her. She realized how much more he had been hiding, and again felt the bitter tang of wrath on her tongue.

Reaching out, she placed her hand on Makoto's shoulder, resting it there gently for a moment before removing it, just as she had done for Rei. As far as Usagi was concerned, neither of them had done anything wrong or that they should feel embarrassed or ashamed of telling. Mamoru had neglected to tell them about the Shittennou, about their past lives, about so many things. They could not anticipate what they did not know or understand. All this confusion and pain in her friends... Her gut clenched at the thought of it all.

Standing up, Usagi walked to the window and stared out of it, unable to look anyone in the eye as she began her story. "I did have a chance to speak with him about it." She refused to say his name. "After Rei left last night, I called him to my quarters to discuss it. I told him that since I let Rei explain things from her point of view, that it was only fair that he have the same chance to do the same. He failed to take me up on that offer. Instead, he attempted to manipulate me. I don't know if he's tried that tactic before, but it was blatantly obvious then." Usagi figured she was getting ahead of herself.

"Nevermind that. I was able to glean some information from his myriad of excuses and combative rebuttals. One, that he does believe the Shitennou are 'good' and not our enemies. I am inclined to agree with both Rei and Luna, as well as Ami. There is a possibility that they were healed and restored from the influence of Chaos. There is a possibility that they could still be our enemies. Regardless, it won't hurt any of us to be careful about how we deal with these men, and to keep a careful eye on them. We might have been saved from these questions and the unfortunate circumstance of being wary of men who do not seem to remember their past selves and otherwise are probably good citizens. However, considering the fact that he did not choose to share critical information that has a dramatic effect on our lives, we must make do with that we can." Usagi's words were clipped and flat, entirely devoid of emotion. She simply had no more emotion left to inject into her speech.

"I have never seen... Mamoru," the name finally slipped out, sending pangs through her heart, "...like I did last night. He was an entirely different person. He was manipulative, arrogant, patronizing, and selfish. He did not care how much trouble and hurt this secret has caused us. He basically told me that I was stupid to feel hurt at all. When it came to excuses, his entire reasoning was that he just didn't feel like mentioning it to us. It was simply too inconvenient for him. When I proved not to be swayed by that particular line of reasoning, he became derisive and-- well, cruel. He chose his words, his delivery, and even his form of address to deliberately be hurtful. And he was far more interested in winning an argument than sharing information or working with me on this problem which has so obviously effected us all. He didn't want me to understand him; he just wanted to be... dominant, I suppose. I was direct with him, but I didn't insult him, I didn't yell at him, and I didn't cry. It didn't matter; he wouldn't even listen to me. I would reply to him and the next thing that came out of his mouth would show me that he hadn't really even heard me at all. There was no real communication; he was just lording himself around and refusing to hear me. And refusing to accept a modicum of responsibility for his role in any of this. That's what terrified me the most-- how little the wellbeing of all of you, and me, meant to him. He had no inkling of how this affected others-- and he didn't really care that it did. He was only unhappy that it was causing unpleasant consequences for him."

She rested her head against the cool glass, feeling a single tear slide down her cheek, dropping onto the carpet and making a small dot. Usagi was afraid that if she turned around, she'd lose any measure of the composure that she was now managing to display.

"What I saw scared me enough to give him back his ring and break the engagement. At first he seemed surprised, but then when he saw how serious I was, he was quite accepting. It didn't seem to phase him all that much, to be honest. He gave me some quip about how perhaps we weren't... destined after all." All of the bitterness and anger that had been void from Usagi's voice was entirely compounded in that one, hated word: destiny. "That's all he could say to me, was to talk about destiny. Nothing about love..."

Swallowing, she straightened and finally turned to face them, her face stony and vacant. "I revoked his provisional clearances and have restricted his access to non-public areas of the Palace. I have also spoken with the Secret Service. Considering the fame that being betrothed to me has given him, he will remain under protection for the rest of his life, should he choose to accept such protection, of course. And it will also be extended to any future spouse or dependents he may have." Usagi sat down again, crossing her legs and leaning back brusquely. She wasn't sure why she tacked that on at the end; perhaps it was her way of saying that this was not a fluke, or a lovers' spat, but that their seven years long relationship was truly over.

[Hino Rei]

A single, simple statement was all that was needed to wrap an icy blanket around Rei's heart. It felt almost literal, the cold claw digging its way into her heart. Lovers? Her and that.. that...

"Kings of the Earth?! Traitors! Liars and traitors the lot of you! I loved yo--"

Rei bit her lip and shook her head at Ami's suggestion. No matter what, even if the crystal had "healed" them, they still had to answer for what they had done. There would always be consequences. Just about to say that aloud, Makoto spoke up to admit what Rei, at least, already knew. Rather than give her friend the glare that she seemed to be expecting, or any air of contempt at all, Rei once more kept her tongue and offered nothing more than the faintest of (what she hoped was) an understanding smile.

Usagi stepped in, then, to give her conclusion to the tale they had begun and Rei found that the ice melted only to be replaced by a bonfire of rage. Though she did not move an inch, the Priestess's face hardened gradually as Usagi's story continued until, in the end, her countenance was as stony and unrelenting as the Queen's... but where Usagi was vacant, Rei burned. She reached to the chair next to her and put her hand on top her Queen's, offering it a firm squeeze.

There weren't words that could help Usagi right now and Rei knew that as well as anyone. Rather than even try, she simply held her hand and waited for the others to make their reactions known. That pride she'd felt for Usagi returned, double fold, as did a tremor of guilt which said that this was, at least in part, her fault.

[Luna]

Luna stiffened and stared at Ami in shock when she blurted out the fact that they had been lovers. This was not something she had been expecting and it only worried her further. This was a complication that the senshi simply didn’t need, it would make things harder for them in the end.

She glanced over at Makoto when she started to talk about the kiss she had shared with Nathaniel and sighed softly. This was going to be harder on them then she had first thought. Luna didn’t know how it would feel to be confronted by former lovers turned enemies and she seriously hoped that she never had to find out. She almost wished that Ami and Makoto hadn’t realized what they might have shared with the Shitennou in the past, it might have made things easier on them in the end.

As much as she wished that she could agree with Ami’s suggestion that they might have been healed, she wasn’t able to. Regardless of who they were or who they might have been, they still needed to answer for whatever they had done. The Shitennou had obviously betrayed the girls not once, but twice. They simply couldn’t afford to hope that they had been healed.

Luna was about to say this when Usagi began to speak. All thoughts of the Shitennou flew from her mind to be replaced by anger at what Mamoru had done. They had trusted him all of these years and this was how he chose to repay them?

As she watched Usagi a deep sorrow filled her heart. Usagi didn’t deserve this, no one did, but Usagi especially didn’t. She had sacrificed so much in her life, had given of herself when she hardly had anything left. Luna was well aware of how much she actually loved Mamoru and knew that this had to have hurt her beyond any way she had ever been hurt before.

Luna vacated her chair quickly and bounded over to the girl she cared so very much for. There wasn’t anything she could say to take the hurt away, but she could be there for her. She leaped up next to Usagi and pressed against her, purring for all she was worth in an attempt to offer comfort. This was one of those times that Luna wished she was in her human form so that she could hug Usagi to her, but since she couldn’t she would simply do the best she could.

[Mizuno Ami]

Ami felt jealous. She knew that it was irrational. Nathaniel seemed to be the source of Makoto's headaches, and Rei was clearly not happy about having brought Jadeite back much less having had been with him intimately. Yet, despite knowing that, she was jealous.

All thoughts of that fled from her mind when she heard what Usagi was telling them. She frowned and moved over to her, sitting by Luna without crowding Luna out. "Usagi..." There were no words that could help, no strategy that could heal Usagi's heart, and Ami felt absolutely helpless, concerned for her friend. Anger would come later, for now she was just worried.

[Kino Makoto]

Makoto looked over to Usagi when she placed her hand on her shoulder. She tried to offer a small smile in return. It turned to a frown as she walked over to the window. Despite the thoughts and feelings coursing through her own mind, she managed to push that all aside while Usagi spoke.

Shocked was the only word that could describe Mako’s reaction. She wanted to leap from her chair and embrace Usagi, hold her hand and tell her that it’ll all be ok. However at this moment, it would most likely be rather inappropriate. She mimicked Rei’s motion and reached over to place her hand on Usagi’s as Luna & Ami moved closer.

Emotions running high, she couldn’t help the tears that were now welling up in her eyes. Her hand still holding onto her Queen’s, she looked to her friends. “What do we do?”

[Neo Queen Serenity]

Usagi's eyes filled with tears as they all seemed to move in, touching her hand, with Luna purring at her side. There didn't need to be any words; this was enough. Just to know that her friends were with her and supporting her gave her the strength she needed to press forward.

"I need you all so much..." she choked out, trying not to bawl as she had so often done in the past. "I don't think I even realized how much until now." So much had changed in their lives, but her need for her friends had not diminished in the least. She didn't want to start crying again, like in the past. She wanted them to be proud of her, and to see her keep it together, like a real Queen should. But they had seen her at her best and her worst. It was impossible to disguise her vulnerability.

She swallowed again, not sure how to respond to Makoto's question. "I... I don't know. Just carry on, I guess. Keep an eye on things... You know, I realized that I never got a chance to talk to Mamoru about the other two that we think might be Shitennou." Things had gone downhill so fast in that argument. "I don't know how much he knows..." Usagi knew she needed to say something about it, but the prospect of facing down her ex-fiancé was daunting, considering how they had last parted.

[Hino Rei]

Rei nodded and pursed her lips. At Usagi's choke she let caution slide to the wind and slipped an arm about the woman's shoulders. After a moment, Rei nodded and said faintly, "Maybe one of us should speak with him then?"

The Priestess cast an imploring eye to the rest of the group. Though she'd suggested it, it wouldn't be the wisest of ideas for her to try it. Especially after this, she thought.

[Luna]

Luna continued purring softly, trying to give Usagi as much comfort as she could. She glanced up at Rei when she mentioned maybe one of them should speak with him and nodded cautiously. Although she wasn’t certain that she liked the idea of any of the senshi going to speak with the man at the moment, they did need to know what he knew.

She remained silent a moment, attempting to think who might be the best candidate to go and speak with Mamoru. Luna wasn’t about to allow Usagi to do so at the moment, at least not on her own. Rei was not particularly an idea candidate either, that would only result in more trouble ... perhaps Ami or Makoto. Ami would probably be the most sensible of the two, she was far more likely to remain calm at any rate. Still, she would leave it up to the girls to decide who should go ... they would be the best judge of how they would act around him. She would only offer a little advice ...

“I don’t think it would be wise for you to go Rei and Usagi, well that wouldn’t be a very good idea either. Ami, you or Mako-chan would probably be the better choice ...”